REBORN 2 WRITE: Writing my IMPERFECT life to share God's PERFECT Love. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love. Romans 5:5
Have you ever wondered if God can read our minds. Does He really care about all our crazy, self-absorbed, funny thoughts that run through are brains moment by moment? Well the answer is: YES He does! This morning I was having some doubts about my writing. I was thinking to myself, (well, I thought it was to
myself…)
“I wish I knew if people read my post or got anything out of
it.”
Then I opened up my Jesus Calling* devotion this
morning, January 20th and it read:
“Approach this day with awareness of who is BOSS.”
That word “BOSS” gripped my heart because that is the final
word I wrote in my last blog post, Unleashing Your Inner Bombshell. Just yesterday, I wrote that God was my BOSS.
The Jesus Calling devotion goes on to read:
“It is I who orchestrate the events of your life…Don’t try
to figure out what is happening. Simply trust ME and thank ME in advance for
the good that will come out of it all.”
And just to drive the point home, the accompanying scripture verse, Isaiah 55:9-11 (MSG) reads:
"I don't think the way you think. The way you work isn't the way I work." God's Decree: "For the sky soars high above the earth, so the way I work surpasses the way you work, and the way I think is beyond the way you think. Just as the rain and snow descend from the skies and don't go back until they've watered the earth, producing seeds for farmers and food for the hungry, So will the words that come out of MY mouth not come back empty-handed. They will do the work I sent them to do, They'll complete the assignment I gave them."
Thank you Lord for speaking to my heart this morning. Thank you Lord for the
reminder: YOUR WORDS. YOUR ASSIGNMENT!!!
I needed to hear from YOU today. Forgive me for my doubts, for trying to figure it all out, and for my sinful nature that allows pride to cloud my mind and heart.
THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, JESUS. ALL FOR YOU ,LORD!
Amen,
Yolanda
PS: If I ever doubted God was reading my mind...question answered. Psalm 139 came alive for me this morning.
O LORD, you have examined my heart
and you know everything about me...
You know my thoughts...
You know everything I do.
You know what I am going to say
Even before I say it...
You go before me...
You place a hand of blessing on my head..
How precious are Your thoughts about me...
When I wake up you are still with me..
Search me, O GOD, and know my heart...
Point out anything in me that offends you...
Lead me to everlasting life....
* Jesus Calling Enjoying Peace in His Presence by Sarah Young
SO
I've just turned 45 and I've decided it was time to take my first
“selfie”. I've been hiding behind the
camera for the last 44 years and it is time to start living in front of it. I
have come to terms with the fact that I am middle-aged and chunky. I've always
been chunky. I’ll probably always be chunky. And you know what, it kind of
works for me. I’m kind of curvalicious.
But
that doesn't mean that I can keep using that as an excuse to be lazy and just
let myself go, especially for health reasons. I once heard a pastor reply when
asked whether women should wear make-up, “If a house needs painting, paint
it.” Good point. So for Christmas I
bought myself a whole drawer of make-up. I didn't plan to buy this stuff but on
trip to a department store with my sister, we treated ourselves to
a spontaneous make-over.
We wanted to try that popular “bombshell girl” eyeliner reminiscent of Marilyn Monroe. WOW! I haven’t had that much fun in a long
time and let’s face it THIS house needed painting. I was so excited about my
“bombshell” eyes that I was obnoxious with the selfies, much to the
embarrassment of my daughter.
I
recently read a post on Facebook about a lady who had refused to have her picture taken because she was self-conscious about her weight. Then after a serious car accident she realized that if she
had died her family wouldn't have any pictures of her. I read that and thought, “That’s me. Why am
I hiding myself?” So for my birthday,
I've resolved to stop living in the past and start living in
the present. To stop making excuses for keeping the status quo which is easy and safe and to challenge myself to
step out of my comfort zone. I need to stop putting my life on hold waiting for a better physical or spiritual version
of myself to materialize. The time for action is now. We are not guaranteed
tomorrow so why not do something worthwhile today.
Over
the Christmas holiday I watched the movie, The Secret Life of Walter Mitty
(2013), and it really resonated with me.
Walter Mitty is a guy who in his youth had big dreams of traveling the
world and was on the verge of going when he lost his dad. This changed the
course of his life because instead of leaving, he stayed and started working in run-of-the-mill jobs. Eventually he found himself working in a dark basement at Life
Magazine where he escaped into his daydreams for adventure. He was too scared to take risks,
to speak up at work, to approach the woman he admired, and life was passing him
by. Suddenly, he is required to track
down a missing photograph and he dusts off his old backpack and travel journal
his father had given him before his death and sets off on a great adventure of
self-discovery. He remembers who he was, who he wanted to be, and ends up experiencing the life he always
dreamed of. At the end of the movie, I wanted to stand up
and cheer because I thought Walter Mitty could be anyone of
us. Something can happen in our lives to get us off track, to paralyze us with
fear, to hurt us, and we retreat and play it safe.
When
I was in high school, I dreamed of becoming a great advertising executive,
living in New York, and in my daydreams I had every single outfit picked out. I
was having Carrie Bradshaw aspirations before she was even
invented. But somewhere along the way I
let fear hold me back and I picked the easier path. I have always let fear
dictate my fate. I was afraid to speak up, talk to the cute guy, afraid to take chances. But in my
daydreams, I was always having great adventures while looking absolutely
marvelous…
After
I turned 40 something happened to me. I believe the Lord was preparing me for something. I started to laugh, relax, and I became more
approachable. At 43, I had a hunger for God and desired His will for my life. Slowly, with God’s loving and patient guidance, I started making those
daydreams into reality. And now at 45, I am ready to embrace my inner bombshell
and unleash her. Because I've realized God doesn't want me to look or act like
anyone else. I would never have made a
good Carrie Bradshaw. I can’t stand wearing heels, I hate crowded cities, and
I’m a one-man girl. And I may not be a
big marketing executive but I can write an impromptu preschool puppet show. And let me tell you it was an inspirational tearjerker.
You
see we all have bombshells inside of us….
I
bet you think I’m talking about your outward appearance…. I’m NOT.
The
bombshell I discovered inside me was there all the time. Just like there is one
inside you waiting to be unleashed. It doesn't matter if you are 25, 45, or 85
or if you are a size 2, 12 or 22. God has created us in His beautiful image;
with the potential to unleash His loving character. But until we realize and
embrace that image, we keep that bombshell inside of our protective shell.
Please let me give you a warning if you want to join me in this adventure! Don’t
release your inner bombshell to please “man” because that only leads to
emptiness and disappointment. Marilyn
Monroe was the greatest example of what the world considers a bombshell and yet
she said, “I always felt insecure and in the way, but most of all I felt
scared. I guess I wanted love more than anything else in the world.” You see regardless of how much make-up I buy
or if I fit into my little black dress from the 1980s, without love I will
always feel empty. Man’s love is fickle but God’s love is constant. God does not care about out our outward
appearance. “God judges persons differently than humans do. Men and women look
at the face; God looks into the heart.” 1 Samuel 16:7. So do you feel like releasing your inner
bombshell? Have you heard the expression, “I’m the bomb”? It means to be cool,
excellent, the best. For us to be “the
bomb” this year we have to be:
B =
BOLD
I
am not a bold person. I don’t take rejection well. I’m easily discouraged. And I struggle with fear. BUT as I've gotten older I have come to rely upon the
following Bible verse:
So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we
will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most. Hebrews 4:16 (NLT)
God wants us to come to Him in our
weakness and ask for help. When I approach His throne, He is faithful to
fill me with His very own Spirit of Boldness so I can go and do His will for my
life. You may wonder, what is God’s
will for my life? It is very simple. Get to know God. Share the Good News of
His Son Jesus. Share what Jesus has done in your life. And love others.
That’s it. You make think, I’m not good with words. I don’t know the Bible
well enough. Guess what? You don’t have to. Because it won’t be you talking, it will be God. Jesus said:
…God will give you the right words at the
right time.For it is not you who will be speaking—it will be the Spirit
of your Father speaking through you. Matthew 10:19-20
I
want to share with you a time that God spoke through me. I was in a college
class and the teacher started talking about the Bible. Everyone, including the teacher, started to mock it. I
remember raising my hand and stating that I believed the Bible was God’s Holy
Word. Well, then they all started mocking me, asking me if I believed all the
“stories” in the Bible. They were throwing out all these different stories when
suddenly I remembered a Christian radio program I had heard the previous day
that seemed to answer their cruel interrogation. I was quoting dates, historical examples, and facts. When I
was done the class was silent. The teacher said, “Well, I guess we will just
have to agree to disagree.” Now this person speaking was not me because I cannot
recall a single fact or date I gave that afternoon. God himself gave me the
words and it was God who defended His Word that day, I just moved my lips and
provided the vocal cords.
You
want to be bold for God. Ask Him to fill you with His Holy Spirit just like He
did the apostles in the Book of Acts. They were filled with the power of Holy
Spirit and they were “The Bomb” that exploded on the world and changed it
forever.
After this prayer, the meeting place
shook, and they were all filled with the Holy Spirit. Then they preached the
word of God with boldness. Acts 4:31 (NLT)
O =
OUTGOING
I
used to have a great pastor. He founded our church and everyone loved him. We
thought he’d preach from our pulpit until the Lord took him home. Then one day
he announced he was stepping down from our church to start a Biker Ministry.
WHAT? He went from slacks and a button down printed shirt to leather, tattoos,
and a bald head. I remember feeling sad and hurt until he preached a few months
later and told us, “The people who are lost, hurting, and unsaved are not in
these four walls. They are out there and if the church wants to reach them, the
church needs to go out there.” Those
words have stuck with me….
You
see, church is for Christians to be fed from God’s Word, to be encouraged
by fellow believers, and to be renewed by the Holy Spirit. But that only happens one
or two days a week. The rest of the
week we are called to be among the unbelievers and to share what we have learned
and to practice what we have been preached.
Recently
my daughter had the “it's not you it's me” talk with her BFF and
unfortunately she was the one on the receiving end. So along with the biggest glass of chocolate milk ever came the following mom advice, “In middle school, BFFs are going to make-up and break-up weekly. You don’t want
to rely on just one person. God has blessed you with joy and a beautiful smile. Use it at school and be a friend to many, especially to those who are alone.” And because God seems to
inspire me in the most unusual ways; He used a piece of newspaper I found in a
restaurant to help me get this message across to my daughter. In the Dear Abby column was a letter
from a senior lady called “Not Lonely in Woodstock, Illinois” who gave some
great advice on friendship. She wrote, “If you want friends, we can’t sit back
and wait for people to come to us. Smile, speak up, pay a sincere compliment –
just communicate! If you do, the majority of people will respond
positively…Many people of all ages fear they wont be accepted. But if they show
up with a friendly attitude, they will be. You have to contribute – whether
it’s with a smile, an opening remark or some other welcoming gesture….I think
many people have forgotten we need to give in order to get.” So if a little old lady from Illinois can be
a “bombshell” than a 12 and 45-year old can too.
The end of the world is coming soon. Therefore, be earnest and
disciplined in your prayers.Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for
love covers a multitude of sins.Cheerfully share your home with those who need a meal or a place
to stay. God has given each of you a gift from his great variety of
spiritual gifts. Use them well to serve one another.Do you have the gift of speaking? Then speak as though God
himself were speaking through you. Do you have the gift of helping others?
Do it with all the strength and energy that God supplies. Then everything you
do will bring glory to God through Jesus Christ. All glory and power to him
forever and ever! Amen. 1 Peter 4:7-11 (NLT)
M=
MOTIVATED
So
even if I’m curvalicious at 45, I know in order to be fabulous at 50
I need to move more. Writing is very sedentary and I tend to sit a lot. My sister has been trying to
get me to exercise and recently she shared a bit of news that supposedly today’s biggest health risk is being
sedentary which is replacing smoking. I hate it when she’s right!
Because I’m
the type of person who does better around people, I put a note in my
coworkers’ mailboxes asking them to join me for an afternoon walk. The shy,
lazy side of me was ready to quit if no one accepted my invitation. I guess God
thought it was time for me to get moving because three of my coworkers agreed
to join me. I have already lost 3
pounds. It love having company because it makes exercising fun and it’s
motivating.
To
motivate can be defined as “to provide an incentive, to move to action or
compassion”. These ladies have provided
an incentive for me because I look forward to talking, laughing, and I hardly
notice that my legs are burning. And
just like these ladies have motivated me, God wants to motivate us by His Holy
Spirit. The Bible says that Jesus was motivated by compassion.
But when He saw the multitudes He was moved with
compassion for them, because they were weary and scattered, like a sheep having
no Shepard. Matthew 9:36 (NKJV)
The
compassion of Jesus moved him to heal the sick, feed the hungry, and teach the
Good News. In Galatians 5:16 (MSG), the Apostle Paul said, “My
counsel is this: Live freely, animated, and motivated by God’s Spirit. Then you
won’t feed the compulsions of selfishness.” So in order to be a bombshell this
year, I am praying that God’s Spirit opens my eyes to the needs of others so
that I am not selfish, that His spirit moves me to compassion, and that His
Spirit of Boldness motivates me to action and prayer.
B = BELIEVE YOU ARE BELOVED
This
is probably the hardest step to take and the biggest hurdle to overcome when unleashing your inner bombshell. Most of us have felt unworthy. We struggle with doubts and fear of rejection. But God
has said that He loves us. He has proved that He loves us by sending His Son, Jesus, to die for our sins. He continues to love us by giving us His own
Spirit to live inside our hearts. But even
though I know all this, there are still days when I think that I have
messed up so bad that God will stop loving me. Then I go back and I
reread my post, Jesus' Holy Hug, and I remember that on December 27, 2012, I
felt God’s love in a tangible way. I remember that God told me, through the
power of the Holy Spirit, that He was proud of me. And then I stop the pity
party. I put on my headphones, blast my worship music, lift my arms to Heaven, thank Him for His blessings, and breath in His love. And I remind myself that God’s word says He
is the same yesterday, today, and forever (Hebrews 13:8). He is unchanging.
That means if God loved me and was proud of me on December 27, 2012, He loves
me and is proud of me today, tomorrow, and forever.
You see most of us are like a pearl hiding inside a safe,
little shell. Do you know how natural pearls are made? They are made when an
irritant, like a piece of sand, gets inside of a mollusk shell. The mollusk
secretes a substance over the irritant, repeatedly, forming a beautiful,
priceless pearl. In the analogy of the pearl, if you haven’t figured it out, we
are the irritants. We come to Jesus
imperfect, flawed, just a speck of sand. But we crawl into the safety of His
shell knowing that we are safe. God doesn't want to keep us as a flawed, speck of sand. He covers us with his Holy
Spirit, repeatedly, continually, as many times as we require over the years
making us into His shining, beautiful, pearls. But just like naturally made
pearls are a prized treasure meant to be seen, so are we. Our testimony is the perfecting work that Jesus has done in our lives and we are meant to show it and share it.
If you are still not
convinced that God can use you regardless of your age, insecurities, perceived
inabilities, or lack of knowledge than let me tell you about one of my 4-year old
preschoolers. Last Friday one of my students, to whom speaking is
difficult because English is his second language, proudly proclaimed to me,
“Mrs. Yolanda I know all about Jesus now.”
“You do? Tell me.”
“God loves us. Jesus lives in our hearts. He takes away
our sins. And Jesus helps the sick people.”
WOW, I blown away! That is the Good News of the Gospel
in a nutshell. Now if a 4 year old who is just grasping the English language
can be a “the bomb” for the Lord, I think we can too.
So I have a feeling 45 is going to be full of adventures with my Lord Jesus. Because you see, God never intended for me to go to
New York and work as an Ad Exec in some small office killing myself to make a
buck. That dream was too small for God. His dream and plan for me was
bigger. I’m His personal Advertising
Executive and my assignment is global.
I’m to advertise His love and plan of salvation to everyone who reads
this Blog. So watch out, because I've got my “Bombshell” girl eyeliner on and
I’m on a mission for my BOSS.
So here I am in the place of worship, eyes open,
drinking in your strength and glory. In YOUR generous love I am really living
at last! Psalm 63:2 (MSG)