Have I mentioned lately that I have a very overactive
imagination? If you combine that with the fact that I'm lacking in the bravery
department, you might as well call me the Cowardly Lion from the Wizard of Oz. But please don’t call me that because, like the
Cowardly Lion, I am aware of my character flaw and I'm working on gaining courage as the following will attest:
First, when I was in elementary school I would walk home after school to an empty house. I would be alone for a while until my sister
got home from high school. If she were
slightly late, I would start to panic and image all sorts of terrible
scenarios. One time she was really late. I remember it felt like forever but
realistically it was probably only a couple of hours.
I completely lost it. I ran down
to her bus stop to see if she was delayed there. When I could not find her, I ran back home and started to have a
complete panic attack. By the time she came home I was a complete sobbing mess. Yes, she was slightly annoyed and embarrassed because she was with her friends but, oh well, that's what little sisters do.
Then when I was in high school there was a terrible serial
killer on the loose. He would sneak into houses at night and attack his
victims. I made my mom lock all of our
windows for the first time ever since living in our rural neighborhood. Did I mention we didn't have air conditioning and it was mid-summer. The family was not happy with me. During this time, I worked as a waitress and a report
had been issued that the killer’s car had been sighted in a neighboring town. I
remember working late one night and having to drive home. By the time my shift was over I had completely psyched myself out. I ran to my car, locked all the doors, and sped
off. As I drove down a dark and deserted street, I started to imagine the killer on the roof of my car. I drove like a
maniac, swerving all over the road in an attempt to get the imaginary menace
off the roof of my car. Thankfully, I
lived in a very rural area and avoided hitting any “sane” drivers on the
road. I peeled into our driveway, jumped
out of the car, and ran into my house. My mom looked at me like I had lost my mind
because I was hyperventilating and near tears.
Finally, there was the terrible night that I gave into peer
pressure and I allowed my high school friends to talk me into seeing the horror
film, A Nightmare on Elm Street. It’s about a frightening killer who enters
people’s dreams whenever they fall asleep. The poor heroine is terrified to
fall asleep less she face the same deadly fate as her friends. By the end of the movie, she had gray hair and so did I. For
some weird reason, when I got home from
the theater no one was home. I was freaked
out and made my way to my upstairs bedroom.
I kept imagining hearing terrible noises downstairs but I was too afraid
to investigate. As I lay in bed
paralyzed in fear, I remember thinking, “I need a Bible.” I wasn't even a Christian yet but I knew in
my heart that as long as I could get my hands on a Bible that God would protect
me. Since I shared a room with my older sister, I borrowed her Bible and
literally placed it on my chest and prayed for God to stay with me. I eventually fell asleep with a sense of
God’s presence and comfort.
After receiving Jesus as my Lord and Savior and studying God’s Word, I have been able to control my fear. When I sense that feeling of fear come over me, I know to immediately turn to Jesus.
I remember reading a book on overcoming fear and learning the value of praying out loud. Whenever you feel a dark and oppressing presence around
you, it is good to pray out loud and proclaim the name of Jesus. You see, Satan and his demons
cannot read our mind. Only God has the ability to read our minds. So if we’re praying in our minds, Satan and
his enemies can’t hear us. Once you
speak the name of Jesus out loud, the power in His Name alone makes the demons flee.
Philippians 2:9-11 (NLT)
Therefore, God elevated him to the place
of highest honor and gave him the name above all other names, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on
earth and under the earth, and every tongue
confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.
Recently
I received some scary news that sent me straight back to Jesus and into my Bible. My daughter and I were driving and talking about God giving
us signs of His presence.
Nonchalantly my daughter says, “I've had an experience like that.” I’m thinking, “Oh cool it’s probably
something really great.” She goes on to share that a few months ago she felt an
ominous presence in her bedroom. Enough that it freaked out our little dog that
sleeps with her and that she felt really oppressed and scared. Now, she claims that she told me this before
BUT judging by the crippling panic attack that overcame me I doubt it. Luckily my older sister was there to keep me from flying completely off
the fear cliff and rushing her over to the nearest church to have holy water
poured over her.
After
calming down a bit, my first reaction was guilt. I started to worry that I had
unconfessed sin in my life that was allowing darkness into our home. I started doing a mental inventory of our
lifestyle and any compromises we were making as a family. I asked the Lord Jesus to forgive me and to
point out anything that He wanted me to change. I also told my husband about
the incident and he immediately prayed over her bedroom and started playing
worship music in our home. We have also started prioritizing praying together on all occasions and especially at nighttime.
During my morning devotions recently, I read Psalm 91 and immediately shared it with my daughter.
Psalm 91 (CEV)
The Lord Is My Fortress
Live under the protection of God Most High and stay in the shadow of God All-Powerful.Then you will say to the Lord, “You are my fortress, my place of safety; you are my God, and I trust you.” The Lord will keep you safe from secret traps and deadly diseases. He will spread his wings over you and keep you secure. His faithfulness is like a shield or a city wall. You won’t need to worry about dangers at night or arrows during the day. And you won’t fear diseases that strike in the dark or sudden disaster at noon. You will not be harmed, though thousands fall all around you. And with your own eyes you will see the punishment of the wicked. The Lord Most High is your fortress. Run to him for safety, and no terrible disasters will strike you or your home.
God will command his angels to protect you wherever you go. They will carry you in their arms, and you won’t hurt your feet on the stones. You will overpower the strongest lions and the most deadly snakes. The Lord says, “If you love me and truly know who I am, I will rescue you and keep you safe. When you are in trouble, call out to me. I will answer and be there to protect and honor you. You will live a long life and see my saving power.”
What
I love about this Psalm is that the author is Anonymous. A lot of the Psalms are written by Kind
David and sometimes when I read them I think maybe they apply to David only or that they are a prophetic message about Israel or the Messiah.
But when I saw that this psalm was written by “Anonymous”, I knew that
the promises of this Psalm are for each and everyone of us. We could all be the authors of this Psalm to
God.
I
told my daughter, “You have an army of angels at your disposal. God has commanded that they protect
you. If you are afraid, call
out to God and ask Him to let loose His angel army in your defense.” With the beautiful faith of a child, she was completely at
peace with her trust in the Lord. And being an only child she is used to her
parents completely freaking out – in a good way- of course.
After reading and mediating on this Psalm, I have begun to
pray that the spiritual eyes of my family and myself are open so that we can
see God’s angelic army fighting on our side.
I want to be like Elisha’s servant who was reassured of God’s love and
protection when surrounded by the enemy army.
2 Kings 6:15-16
When Elisha’s servant got up the next morning, he saw that Syrian troops had the town surrounded. “Sir, what are we going to do?” he asked.“Don’t be afraid,” Elisha answered. “There are more troops on our side than on theirs.” Then he prayed, “Lord, please help him to see.” And the Lord let the servant see that the hill was covered with fiery horses and flaming chariots all around Elisha.
Just like the servant was reassured that
the victory was theirs because God's angelic army was on their side, we can be
reassured that God is always on our side. All that God asks is that we love Him
and truly know who He is. Then He
guarantees us all the promises of Psalm 91.
He will be our Mighty Fortress
He will keep us safe and secure
He is our Mighty Protector
He is our Valiant Defender
He is our Eternal Salvation
Last night, I felt the need to go to
church and be in God’s presence. As I sang worship songs, I prayed for
forgiveness, I prayed for a renewing of the Holy Spirit's power in my life, I asked to feel His love in a tangible way, and I
dedicated my Blog to Him again. I
asked God to bless my writing and to use it however He deemed fit. Here’s how God answered my prayers:
I've known since reading Psalm 91 that I
wanted to write a devotion on it but I felt like my thoughts were disjointed. The
only thing I knew for certain was that I wanted to include the worship
song, “Whom Shall I Fear [God of Angel Armies]. So last night when our worship band started to sing, “You hear me
when I call…..” I wanted to shout, “LORD, that’s my song! You’re playing my
song!” I felt God smiling down on me
and as tears filled my eyes, I raised my hands and thanked Him for confirming
that He hears my prayers, He forgives me, and He is my inspiration.
I believe God wants to remind us that
even though the days are frightening with all the uncertainty surrounding us, even if it seems like evil is winning, even if we are being attacked from all sides, even if we feel
Satan waging a war for our soul and for the souls of our
children, he will NOT win. In the
battle against us and for us, the God of Angel Armies is always on our side.
Jesus already conquered our enemy on the cross when He defeated death and rose
again. He is up in Heaven cheering me on saying, “Yolanda, I love you. Don’t be afraid. Keep learning about me so you
will truly know who I am. The more you know me the more confident you will be
in the fact that I've got everything under control. The victory is MINE. There is no enemy that can come against you or your family as
long as you always make me a part of your family.”
So my Daddy in Heaven has got this…..I can sleep soundly tonight.
How about you? Do you have trouble sleeping?
How about you? Do you have trouble sleeping?
Love,
Yolanda
Cool video by Chris Tomlin on inspiration for worship song, "Whom Shall I Fear [God of Angel Armies]"
