But I'm Angry, LORD!

Yesterday, I lost my temper. Some deeply hidden bitterness (OK, not so deep) crept into my heart and a conversation brought up unresolved resentment. So, I vented and spewed my word vomit to my daughter who wisely asked me, “Mom, why are you so angry?”
Because, I’m right and they are wrong. Duh!
I wish I could say that was the end of it, but no. I spewed the tale to my husband.
Who agreed with my viewpoint, but did it calmly and rationally.
So annoying!
And, because I felt justified in my opinion of this individual who has hurt and offended me, I laid my head on my pillow and went blissfully to sleep.

I woke up, made my iced coffee, and sat down to read my Bible and devotion. The first scripture that jumped out at me was:

Ephesians 46:26-30 (MSG)

Go ahead and be angry. You do well to be angry. 

I read that line and thought, “See, I knew I was right!” Then I kept reading…

BUT don’t use your anger as fuel for revenge. Don’t stay angry. Don’t go to bed angry. Don’t give the Devil that kind of foothold in your life.Watch the way you talk. Let nothing foul or dirty come out of your mouth. Say only what helps, each word is a gift.Don’t grieve God. Don’t break his heart. His Holy Spirit, moving and breathing in you, is the most intimate part of your life, making you fit for himself. Don’t take such a gift for granted.

I read it again.
And again.
I tried different translations just to make sure that I wasn’t misunderstanding.
I wanted to say, “God, but, but, they do this, they say that, I feel…”

I read it once more and personalized it, “Yolanda, go ahead and get angry. It’s OK to have that initial reaction. But don’t stay angry. Don’t spew all that foul, bitter language. Don’t give the Devil that kind of foothold in your life. Don’t grieve ME. Don’t break MY heart. My Spirit is moving and breathing in you making you fit for ME. Don’t take MY gift for granted.”

Ouch! Pierced right to the heart.

For the word of God is living and active and full of power [making it operative, energizing, and effective]. It is sharper than any two-edged sword, penetrating as far as the division of the soul and spirit [the completeness of a person], and of both joints and marrow [the deepest parts of our nature], exposing and judging the very thoughts and intentions of the heart. Hebrews 4:12 (AMP)

God, through His gift of the Holy Spirit, was warning me, “Danger, danger, Yolanda. Don’t let the Devil get a foothold in your life. He’s prowling like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.”

I stopped what I was doing, confessed my sin, repented, and asked for God’s forgiveness. Then, I gave Him thanks for His Word because it keeps me close to His heart.  I would be lost without it. I took a moment to apologize to my husband and daughter for losing control. And, then the LORD blessed me with 30 minutes of uninterrupted time alone with Him to praise and worship Him in the Spirit. My heart felt lighter, renewed, filled with His love. My Savior and LORD, Jesus Christ, who’s shed blood covers me in His righteousness, defeated any foothold the Devil tried to gain. Hallelujah!

That is why reading God’s Word first thing in the morning is such a priority. God is waiting for us to wake up. He wants a personal encounter with us each morning so He can speak to us through His Word because it is alive and full of power. It gets right to the heart of the matter, even if sometimes we go “ouch, message received, LORD.”

His Word is
food for our soul
nourishing and sweet
loving
life giving
eye opening
enlightening
encouraging
healing
comforting
Protection from the Enemy
Our road map
And survival guide

Do not start your day without it. Hide it in your heart so you can recall it in times of need. Cherish it like a prized treasure. Be willing to share that treasure with others. If you are willing to be used by God to share the Good News of Jesus, be ready because He'll send people your way. In these last days, as the world gets darker and many are fearful and stressed, God will place these people in our path seeking the hope we have in Him.

Love,
Yolanda

PS: If you are having trouble reading your Bible because you don’t know where to start, it seems overwhelming, or you get distracted. I recommend the One Year Bible. It breaks down the Bible in 365 sections that take approximately 15 minutes to read. Each 15-minute daily reading includes a section of the Old Testament, New Testament, Psalms, and Proverbs. You will find that when you start reading the Bible consistently it will come alive to you. God will speak to you and some days His message to you will jump off the page. Just like it did for me today. Highlight that scripture. Write yourself a note in your Bible with the date. These are all ways to hide God’s Word in your heart.